Ken's Amazing Cybercats

They are mystery incarnate
These ethereal companions by our side.
Though ever independent, never fully known,
We are blessed to receive these envoys
Of the magic Tiger Tribe.

"A computer and a cat are somewhat alike -- they both purr, and like to be stroked, and spend a lot of the day motionless. They also have secrets they don't necessarily share." -- John Updike, in The New Yorker

I live with two cats, Jazz and Sonata. They're terribly excited about having a presence in cyberspace, so much so that they insisted on having their own web pages (you'll find the links to their personal home pages a little further down this page). How can I refuse? My feline friends are constant companions while I work and play at my computer. As a cat-owned human, I have a few feline attributes. I'm nocturnal (or would be, except for this pesky day job thing), and I'm usually wearing cat hair (it's "on loan" from my furry friends). However, unlike my cats, I don't come equipped with four-wheel drive, so you won't catch me running around the house at 2 A.M. I'm a software developer, and there's a pretty accurate saying that programmers are like cats -- they both believe the world exists solely for their amusement.

Theory of Parallel Evolution

The first computers were enormous and are now extinct.
The latest computers are smaller, quicker, and seem harder to control.
The first cats in prehistoric times were enormous and are now extinct.
The latest cats are smaller, quicker, and seem harder to control.

A Tale of Two Kitties
They're both black & white, reminiscent of piano keys or sheet music, so their names are Jazz (the boy) and Sonata (the girl). I adopted them when they were about 10 weeks old. Jazz is noticeably larger than his sister, and the folks at the animal shelter thought he might be a month older than Sonata, but they were brought in by the same person and I think they're littermates. I think they were born at the same time, and they're not telling (they say "we're supposed to be mysterious you know"), so that's that. I call them The Twins. Both have an identical small black dot on the left nostril, and they are inseparable.

"The Yin-Yang Picture"

They provide "help" while I'm typing or reading, which usually consists of looking cute and wanting to be right where the action is. It's a good thing that they're cute, for all I have to put up with. (I got a tremendous amount of "cat help" while writing these web pages -- any typos are entirely their fault!) They like to watch movies. When I open up the bag of goodies, they can transform themselves into "treat-seeking missiles". They love to chase each other up and down the stairs and across the bed in the middle of the night (they say they're practicing their "Musical Cybercats" routine). About a third of cats do not have the genetic makeup to enjoy catnip. Not only do these two not like catnip, they are afraid of the stuff. I grew fresh catnip for my previous cat, and it was with great anticipation that I offered a leaf to my new kittens. They approached cautiously, sniffed once, then backed up and circled way around this obviously deadly leaf. I was so disappointed. But my sister says, "For reasons unknown, cats aren't susceptible to the influences of catnip until they're at least 6 months old. Your kids are way too young for the stuff." It's too bad they have no fear of tea. They won't drink it, but they will sneak up and lick the inside of my cup, probably just to hear me squawk.


In the cat bed, at 10 weeks. Sonata (left) and Jazz (right).		Same bed, at 7 months. Sonata (front) and Jazz (back).

As the pictures above show, the kitties grew fast! They just haven't realized it yet. They have no sense of personal space with each other, and it's not unusual to see them sleeping sprawled across each other, as in this picture with Sonata piled on top of Jazz, who is snoozing happily. (I had to set up the towel for them to sleep on since the cat bed obviously was no longer working out well.)

"It only looks uncomfortable"

My cybercats offer this advice to other felines who own computer literate humans: "Computers offer several opportunities. Try walking across the keyboard. See, you can type too! Any loose floppy disks belong on the floor. See that they get there. Rub against the screen. What a nice crackling sound, and notice how your fur sticks to it! If your human uses a mouse, bat at it as it moves, or grab and chew the cord. When the printer is in use, sit on the paper. If your human is using a phone, try to catch the cord or antenna as it moves. Rub your face against the hand set. If it has buttons, push them with your nose. The human on the other end will be very impressed that yours is owned by a cat."

	You can also visit Tabitha's Page, dedicated to my first cat.
	Kashmir was Mistletoe's companion until 2001.
	Mistletoe was my beloved companion from 1989 - 2003.

"Until he extends the circle of his compassion to all living things, man will not himself find peace." -- Albert Schweitzer

About Ken's Amazing Cybercats
This page is just one part of Ken's World, my home page. Since many web surfers are more interested in cats and not this human (hard to believe, but true), I've set up Ken's Amazing Cybercats as a second "front door" to my web site. Many of the images on these web pages are not original artwork. Where the original artist is known, the images are used with the artist's permission. If you see your original artwork here and you believe it to be used inappropriately, please write to me.

Ken's Amazing Cybercats won the web site award for January 2004 from Funny Pets